Saturday, March 17, 2012

Second Guessing 03/17/12

I've been really confused the last couple of days. One minute I want to fight for him and fight for what I want and the next I'm ready to give up. I find myself pulling away and not sure how to just let things go. Yesterday he went to the Riverwalk without me so obviously he's not reading all this. I've told him several times if he wants to know what I'm thinking or what I want to just read this. Since he hasn't it makes me feel like he doesn't really care. He is always on his phone or computer, Facebook messenger usually. I don't know who all he's talking to and I'm not gonna assume it's just his hoes. I would have no problems at all letting him go through my phone right now and read everything there is to read. Could he say the same? How long and hard do I have to fight before I just give up? I haven't kissed him in several days and I know he has noticed but hasn't asked why. Does it bother him? I don't know. I'm afraid to say anything because I don't want to fight. The sex has slowed down a little bit. Maybe two days a week now. Not sure what to say about that one. I know that I haven't made the first move in a week, maybe longer. Maybe I will try today. Maybe today will be the day that he says he loves me and it will all be better. Maybe.

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